Thinking about Psalm 39

⁴ “Show me, LORD, my life’s end 
   and the number of my days; 
   let me know how fleeting my life is. 
⁵ You have made my days a mere handbreadth; 
   the span of my years is as nothing before you. 
Everyone is but a breath, 
   even those who seem secure."


I wanted to share what's been on my heart and mind this week and do it with as much humility as possible. It's a little scary putting your personal thoughts out here like this, but maybe it's not such a bad idea.

  Sunday night, I sat down and opened up my bible.  I flipped to Psalms with no specific chapter in mind.  I stopped at Psalm 39.  I read the entire thing and then decided to read it again with the commentary.  I really focused in on verses 4 and 5.  It's funny how you can hear something your entire life and it mean one thing, but then you enter a phase where things are sounding brand new and different and the Lord is actually there and using something to change your life.  I am so grateful for this.  The commentary posed the question, if you had six months to live, what would you do different?  How would you live?  Okay, so who hasn't been asked this question?  But this is what I'm talking about....I've heard this my entire life...but for some reason, on Sunday night, it was different.  So I've been pondering this question since then.  What would I do if I only had six months to live?  How would my life change?  What is most important?  First off...it's not about me.  That was the first thing.  And then I started thinking....wow, I am pretty selfish.  Everything is about me.  Me, me, me.  And then some more me.  Whether I am aware of it or not, I am making this very real choice.  Choices that are the same every day.  So I have a choice here....to do as I am called as a believer or not.  It seems that I regularly choose the later.  Maybe even without knowing it.  So that brings me to the awareness factor.  I have to choose to be aware of my choices even before I make them.  What does this look like?  For me, praying about it.  Before I leave the house for the day.  Or actually, praying about it before I am even out of bed(selfishness starts early for me).  And praying constantly, giving it up to Christ.  Where does this start?  With my husband, who gets to see the ins and outs of my selfishness every single day....lucky him!  I hope and pray that by being aware, by making different choices, that my life reflects Christ's life.  Not for my own glory, but for His.  That's the hard part for me....not for my own glory.  It's so easy(I am proof) to think that you have an entire lifetime and that "one day ....this" and "one day.....that."  I want to start living my life for Christ NOW.  Today.  Because I may just have six months.....or maybe I have 100 years on this earth.  I don't know.  But I am not called to wait.  My life is but a mere blip on the earth radar.  So what choices do I think I should be making?  What does that look like every day?  I guess I will have to figure that out as I go.  It's daunting for me, but I know that with Christ all things are possible!  I know I will fail constantly...more than I would like to think, but if I'm in God's hands, it will all be okay.




I can do all things through Him who strengthens me. 
-Philippians 4:13 

And looking at them Jesus said to them, "With people this is impossible, but with God all things are possible." 
-Matthew 19:26